The Gleam of Moonlight
Thursday, March 3, 2011
I don't know who I am, do you?
Just this morning, I was feeling ecstatic after my DFD practical. I think this is the 1st time I've enjoyed a prac.
I know I love the sense of satisfaction and achievement academically.
And just a while ago I felt so fresh joining Juliana and Claire for lunch :)
I know I love seeing friends.
But the next moment, my mood just dropped...I lost 3 of my pendrives in one go. What would you have done in this situation? VENT OUT all your frustrations to your close friends? Eat ice-cream and tell yourself that it's no big deal? Probably that's what normal people do. But this someone called Renee...STARBURN~~ I tell you...STUBBORN!! She doesn't join friends for dinner anymore. Stayed in, turned on the lappie, listen to sentimental songs, trying to forget what had happened, but ended up stressing in her coursework (自己吓自己那种）
Then, Yen Shiang and Sook Theng came..JUST IN TIME~ I actually felt great after talking to you girls. Crapping about anything, everything...although I don't really know you girls well. I really felt a lot better. Does it really work that way? Can't I just keep stuff to myself? The society has changed...人心不可测。。
Then came another person. A pretty young girl that I've always look highly upon. She's caring, loving and she surprised me tonight. This question came out of her "mouth" (actually it was through fb).
Hui Ching, you're not the quiet type right? Man I thought what I've done to have made her asked me this.
And then I realised she wanted to know me better. She say she can see her in me...or see me in her?
Yes, I was indeed the very-quiet type of girl years ago. Everyone knows that and sees me that way.
I know you're not an introvert. You can talk crap and be very crazy with people that you're comfy with right?
Hmm...BINGO? Eversince I went back to Malaysia from Adelaide, people have commented I've become more cheerful and confident. Well, actually I'm not too sure about that. Maybe in some ways yes...I must admit it's somehow a bit related to my participation in church activities and some other factors over here. It's just plain weird. Sometimes my laugh can be a disguise...for my sadness or fear.
I was a lil' surprised that someone actually sees me sensitive enough to realise some things that other people don't.
Yes I agree with Fen, you know a lot of things, but you chose to keep them inside you. But you'll let it out when you're with people you're comfortable with. People discover you. I am very much a confident-less girl. A small thing breaks me, but I'm confirmed by God's words that I'm faithfilled, so I am. I have hard times too and I'm learning to be strong. Be confident girl! Don't worry about your future kay? It's in God's hands and you are unique in God's eyes.
Thanks a million jie. You know who you are. May God bless you in getting a job, your PR...may whatever you're undertaking be smooth-sailing. Don't stress out too much kay? <3 xoxo
*yawn* I'm tired...coffee, anyone? nights
*ching*
4:58 AM
